With our June Speaker Series focus on Conscious Discipline, we have decided to build this month’s newsletter around the topic of EQ in the family.
Yes, PFP’s focus is to connect and enable high-EQ professionals, but the benefits of EQ are certainly not restricted to the professional sphere. Below are some different options for you to begin exploring and reaping benefits from EQ in the home.
Research indicates that increased Emotional Intelligence leads to better health, academic achievement, and stronger relationships! It’s a learnable, measurable, scientifically-grounded skill set that helps children…
· Navigate increasing complexity and stress
· Foster positive, healthy relationships
· Spark innovation and resilience
· Nourish compassion and inner peace
· Grow as a positive change-maker
Video Interview: Conscious Discipline
June 26th Guest Speaker; Ashley Cooper
Join us on June 26th, 7pm-8:30pm at HQ Raleigh where Ashley will introduce our audience to the Conscious Discipline Model. Enjoy networking, appetizers and walk away with immediately applicable tips where you can apply Conscious Discipline’s EQ-based methodologies to see the benefits both at home and in your professional life.
Resources for Exploring EQ at Home
1). EQ 101 for Parents by the Emotional Intelligence Network: https://eq.org/learn/courses/parents/
“We all want to be the best parents we can be and raise happy, healthy, and successful children. As parents, we experience many joys as well as moments of great difficulty; we face many challenges from within ourselves, from our children, from others in our family, and from our schools and the environment in which we live.
Using an EQ model, such as Six Seconds, provides a common language or framework for talking with adult partners and with our children. As parents we can model EQ for our children, and using the language of EQ, take advantage of many a teachable moment.”
2). Book Review: “The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind, Survive Everyday Parenting Struggles, and Help Your Family Thrive”
In this pioneering, practical book, Daniel J. Siegel, neuropsychiatrist and author of the bestselling Mindsight, and parenting expert Tina Payne Bryson demystify the meltdowns and aggravation, explaining the new science of how a child’s brain is wired and how it matures. The “upstairs brain,” which makes decisions and balances emotions, is under construction until the mid-twenties. And especially in young children, the right brain and its emotions tend to rule over the logic of the left brain. No wonder kids can seem—and feel—so out of control. By applying these discoveries to everyday parenting, you can turn any outburst, argument, or fear into a chance to integrate your child’s brain and foster vital growth.
EQ Real Life Story: Buying/Selling a Home
PFP Member and Leader, Andrew Finegan
My fiance and I were excited. She had accepted the job offer, knowing it meant a relocation. It was a great opportunity and we had to jump on it. We put our home on the market, set our sights on a new home, and started our journey.
Within a week of listing our home, we had an offer. We accepted, and found ourselves under contract 7 days after hitting the market. We began packing and pre - move cleaning. We excitedly talked about our new home, and picked a restaurant for our first date in our new town.
Two week before the closing date, we received a short email: “Buyer no longer interested in property.”
That email felt like Mike Tyson had body checked me. My stomach was in knots. I was gripped with anxiety, fear, and anger.
In the time we had been off the market, 4 similar homes in our neighborhood had gone up for sale. The home we had made an offer on was due to close the following month. We had made our mover’s deposit for a date that was no longer valid. I was so overwhelmed, I could not think. I was frozen by my emotions, and could not take action to fix my challenge.
I was acutely aware of how I was feeling, but in the moment could not focus those energies on fixing the underlying problem. This Emotional Intelligence challenge falls under Self Management. Self Management is “your ability to use your awareness of your emotions to stay flexible and direct your behavior positively.”
I turned my energy to the Self Management strategy “Speak to someone who is Not emotionally invested in your problem.” I laid out the full story to a friend. To my surprise, the friend had experienced a very similar situation. Their advice was simple: “Change the things you can, and for the things you can’t- let it go.” My emotions were wrapped up in the things I couldn’t change, not the things I could. This perspective cleared my head, and enabled me to make positive changes to my situation.
Now that we are happily under contract again, I will invest time into Self Management strategies today, to prevent my emotions from crippling me tomorrow.
TOLA Regional Chair, Chris Amaefule
In honor of May being Mental Health Awareness Month, the PFP Dallas team had a number of conversations focused on the link between Emotional intelligence and improving one’s mental health. With all the responsibilities we’re committed to in our daily lives, it’s easy to forget about taking care of yourself. I know it sounds ironic but how often do we start the day by asking ourselves, “how do you feel” or “why do I feel this way”?
For those who are asking what emotional intelligence has to do with their mental health, Dr. Shannon V. McHugh identified that, “those who have a lesser understanding of emotions and how they’re expressed can experience difficulty connecting and relating to other people, and they can struggle significantly with regulating their own internal emotions” (McHugh 2019). Studies have found that high EQ (emotional quotient) correlates to an increased likelihood of use coping skills that improve, not only our relationships with others, but our own mental health.
Self-Care is not just a hashtag on Instagram, it’s a core competency of Emotional intelligence and as the month of May comes to a close, I’d like to share a simple three-step process that has helped me on my journey to improve my self-control and mental health. The process can be found here (www.free-management-ebooks.com/faqpp/developing-03.htm), but it all goes back to asking yourself this simple question every morning and evening, “how do [I] feel”.
If you’re interested in self-improvement and real life exercises to help you daily, PFP is building a network of business professionals grounded on emotional intelligence to promote leadership, increase community engagement and foster skills for professional development leading to a happier and more fulfilling life.
On June 25th we’ll be hosting our first PFP Information Mixer in partnership with Cisco and AppDynamics. Come learn how you can apply EQ to your operating rhythm, meet like-minded individuals and grow both personally and professionally.
Block your calendars from 5:30-7:30, be on the lookout for more details and we look forward to seeing you all in June.